I am going to be his prison wife. I already have the letter written and addressed. Of course Choire will be there first when he gets visiting hours, but my letter will be much more meaningful to him.

Isn't it just sick when you find cannibals attractive (although not so attractive I'd let him have a drumstick)?

Man, I'm glad Hillary lost now.

I think that little "Submit" button right below this entry box should force you to take the math test. You'd get far less comments from me.

@snakefinger. You make me mad. California is the most generous State in America. When you see a busload of immigrants from Phoenix or Las Vegas being kicked off on Skid Row L.A. (which I have), and know they'll probably find a home and a living, because we respect them and care for them, you might change your mind. But probably not - you're probably in San Diego, where all illegal immigrants are handcuffed and dumped in LA. Or you're from SF or Manhattan, where people don't know sh*t about helping those who want to help themselves.

Actually, if the United States were required to pay California about 5% of what California willingly spends to educate and provide medical treatment for an estimated 1/3 of the nation's illegal immigrants, the US would be looking to California for a bailout. No, this is not an immigrant rant.

Lovely, I guess I'll be getting my Welcome Back to Chase postcard pretty quickly. Christ, that bank is stalking me.

Blowing it out your ass again, eh Balk? :) Also, in a week of maniacal press coverage of the financial meltdown and ensuing depression, I am not sure anyone gives a flip about a one-hour, heavily moderated debate, in which no new information will be gleaned most likely. Hopey needs to lay off the hope and show he means business. Also, one of these dudes is going to inherit this mess in DC once President, so maybe they are more important than 2 in 535.

Wow, you also should have included the hour before that Chris Rock trash, the part where Bill Clinton gives a stump speech on the economy and jobs that Barack Obama should be required to memorize and repeat verbatim in response to absolutely any question he is asked about any subject, rather than sitting back and waiting for the effing Democrats to get back their polling results back on what America thinks about this.

Classy! When this filters back to the Swing States, they'll be sure to jump on the Obama bandwagon!

I noticed that Gawker has posted nothing about PallMailGate all day, unless you count Ryan Tate, who posted at 8:27am, which means it actually posted at 5:27am in his timezone, which means he probably wrote it before he went to bed last night. Suspicious, in that they do love to suffer over there. Nick must be more afraid of anal prison rape than we thought.

Whatever else you want to say about Lauren Conrad, she has the best management team of any celebrity in the reality world. Who else could get this girl a 3-book deal, and all the other crap she's reeled in?

Well, just try finding Joe Biden these days.

Oxycontin is a miserable drug, more addictive than heroin, that ruins the lives of thousands of people, two of whom I know personally. It is rampant in high schools everywhere. It also causes you to lose about 2/3 of your body weight, if you use it regularly. Track appears to be well-fed so if he was using, he quit a long time ago, with the help of a rehab center. Plus I doubt the army lets you in without a drug test. This just generates more sympathy for the plight of the working Alaskan hockey mom and generates more ire and wrath amongst the conservatives. Really, there are better ways to attack the Republican ticket.

It's probably worth noting that Obama and Biden both voted in favor of the Bridge to Nowhere. I think I'd look elsewhere to beat up on Palin, like maybe education reform, foreign security experience, etc. But that might be too easy.

Ooooh, did Choire just get served (I'm still trying to figure out that "straw man" comment from yesterday)? Anyway, having the misfortune to be stuck in one of those uncosmopolitan places during this election cycle, I can attest that this commentary on the shortsightedness of the Obama Democrats is pretty unassailable. People continued to vote for Clinton long after she lost the primary, because whether or not true, she seemed to be one of them (or at least one of them more than Obama). His failure to pick her as his VP will probably go down as one of the biggest mistakes in U.S. political history. Biden adds nothing to this ticket.

Well Reid's people called Palin "shrill," so let the battle carry on. I'm going out for vodka.

Fuck Off Shaynerson. You're a disgrace to your gender.

Actually, you could just change the geography and write the exact same story about rich young New Yorkers in LA, like that "Fabian" "Cattle Drive" dude, or the hordes of Manhattan Ivy League jerks trying to break into the industry. Jerks are jerks. Their hometowns really don't matter. P.S. Lindsay Lohan becomes a Los Angeleno just by living there? What?

I ordered 8 copies of the DVD, in case I wear out the first 7. And a gallon of Gun Oil. Oh la la.

Closure. Finally. Now, can we get Neel Shah to take secret spy photos of Michael Phelps screwing someone?

I was just thinking the other day how awesome Bananarama used to be.

This in-depth reportage will never be complete until the Enquirer reporter and you make wild love amidst the discarded receipts in the dumpster behind John Edwards' house.

Simon Scowl, an "unnamed security guard." Screw that, when you're trying to out this story.

Honestly, if just one person came forward other than the putz Enquirer reporter (with no camera) who allegedly trespassed into a hotel at 2am and held John Edwards hostage in a bathroom for 15 minutes (do Enquirer reporters pack heat? maybe he knows Muy Thai? anywhose, how the hell do you trap someone with bodyguards in a bathroom in a hotel that's generally crawling with security guards?), this might be interesting. The MSM is just doing its job by ignoring a story with incredibly poor sourcing, but Gawker apparently thinks you should libel now and apologize later.

Most comments on most gay blogs just make me want to will myself into having sex with Audrina Patridge.

Hmmm, well I guess a reporter parking on LC's street, then walking up and down it bugging all the neighbors, just isn't nearly as bothersome as some paps and the production crew.

Balk!!!!!!! Gawd, I missed your recaps. I'll email you, somewhere, as soon as I hear anything worth repeating. They kind've put it all out there in that preview though.

OMG, Choire. All I can do is picture you in your Laura Ashley PJs, asleep on some stinky island off NY (or is it CT?). Anyway, sometimes you are so boneable.