Writing the Christian Romance

A guide for the excessively smug and sinful

lead_image_225.jpg
THE CHAMP A secular Fabio cover, reinvented
Tucked in the corner of your local Borders, far away from Fabio-graced titles like Enchantress Mine and Lord Savage, is a place where love doesn't just dare speak its name—it lifts it on high. Well, at least his name. It's the Christian romance section. And, aspiring novelists take note, it's one sector of the sputtering publishing industry that's slowly, steadily growing.

According to Book Industry Trends 2007, religious books in general show the "highest growth in dollar sales" across the industry. And Christian romances lead the charge, accounting for 11.4 percent of all romance paperback sales. That's a 30 percent increase from 2005, with the numbers continuing to grow.

In other words, with the market saturated with tales of infidelity, suicide, and baby stealing, your quasi-autobiographical memoir, Ketamine: A Curious Love Story, may languish in the slushpile—just one more bit of Sodom in Gomorrah. Better, and smarter, to earn your table at Michael's—or at least your residuals—with a PG romp targeted at millions of America's book-buying faithful.

Of course, for the secular writer, crafting a Christian romance means shooting all your darlings, substituting spiritual elements and "takeaway faith" messages for traditional page-flipping staples like violence, profanity, and sex. (According to Gail Gaymer Martin, author of Writing the Christian Romance, this is nonnegotiable, as "Christian romance stresses chastity for the unmarried, and married couples close the bedroom door.")

So, with these limitations in mind, and using Martin's book as a guide—we'll hesitate to call it our bible—Radar adopts six easy steps: Crafting a Christian romance ... for the excessively smug and sinful.



cover_WTCR2.jpg
OUR GUIDEBOOK Writing the Christian Romance by Gail Gaymer Martin
Step 1: FIND YOUR STORY
"List all the fairy tales you can think of ... select one, and see how you could develop a contemporary Christian romance from the idea. Then do the same using bible verses."

From Snow White's prince-hungry crooning to The Little Mermaid's theme of filial abandonment, simply too many fairy tales—rife with opportunities to explore the spiritual elements of true love—have been appropriated by the gay-coddling Disney corporation. Taking the next logical step, then, a Christian writer should consider Googling "random bible verse generator." The verse Radar received seemed particularly apt, and prime for fleshing out into a complex but right-minded tale of boy meets girl, boy redeems girl, girl makes sinful mistake, regrettable dry-humping commences:

"The crown of pride, the drunkards of Ephraim, shall be trodden under feet:" —Isaiah 28:3

Next: Create your star-crossed lovers >>



< BACK TO Features

 


Sexual Politics
Election 2008 hasn't just been dirty, it's been downright smutty

Full Court Press
Bill Kristol, Jane Mayer, and the rest of this week's winners and sinners

Adult Friends Forever
With more than 30 million users, Adult FriendFinder is the Web's No. 1 meat market. But what kinds of kinksters actually use the site? Radar signed up to find out

Full Court Press
Charles Kaiser on the final presidential debate

Snort Selling
Radar's investment guide to cocaine, hookers, and other vices



Email us at:
tips@radaronline.com
or IM: TipRadar







Jodie Sweetin Plugs Book, Not Court Case

Comedy Is Not Pretty

Anna Nicole Smith Judge Innocent

Give Our Regards To Beijing...

Super New Games On The Way

No Room For The Bidens

Hunk Helms One Tree Hill

Levi Cans Himself

Brolin Charges Dropped

Three Nights Of Laughter





Opie Taylor for Obama
Richie Cunningham too

Sarah Meets Woody
The perfect romantic comedy for purple states

McCain Left On Campaign Bus Overnight
From The Onion News Network

Terry Tate: Reading Is Fundamental
He's back!

O'Reilly vs. Frank, Round 2
Barney Frank enters the no spin zone, again!